This year we are honoring 19 Women Human Rights Defenders from the Latin America and the Caribbean region. 16 defenders were murdered, including 6 journalists and 4 LGBTQI rights defenders. Please join us in commemorating the life and work of these women by sharing the memes below with your colleagues, friends and networks and by tweeting using the hashtags #WHRDTribute and #16Days.

Please click on each image below to see a larger version and download as a file

See Our 2015 WHRD Tribute

As world leaders gather in Brazil, it’s vital that feminist movements especially from the Global Majority have autonomous spaces to gather, strategize, and disrupt.

These Hubs challenge the elitism of climate talks, center lived experiences, and aim to build collective power across borders. They offer a critical counterbalance to top-down, often exclusionary international negotiations. The Hubs aim to foster community-driven solutions, amplify feminist demands, and ensure that feminist principles of care and solidarity shape the climate agenda. It’s not just about being present at COP30, it’s about reshaping the conversation on climate justice on feminist terms.

After assessing your organization’s capacity and research goals, you may choose to conduct a survey as one of the methods of data collection for your research analysis.

In this section:

• Why conduct a survey?
• Identify your survey population
  1. Online survey
  2. Paper survey
• Create your questions
  1. Short and clear questions
  2. Simple and universal language
  3. "Closed" and "open" questions
  4. Logical organization
  5. Less than 20 mins
  6. Simple and exciting
• Test and translate
  1. Your advisors
  2. Draft and test
  3. Translation
• Target the right population
  1. Sample size
  2. Degree of participation
  3. Database and contact list

Why conduct a survey?

A survey is an excellent way to gather information on individual organizations to capture trends at a collective level.

For example, one organization’s budget size does not tell you much about a trend in women’s rights funding, but if you know the budgets of 1,000 women’s rights organizations or even 100, you can start to form a picture of the collective state of women’s rights funding.

As you develop your survey questions, keep in mind the research framing that you developed in the previous section.

Remember: Your framing helps you determine what information you are trying to procure through your survey. The data collected from this survey should allow you to accomplish your goals, answer your key questions, and create your final products.

See examples of survey questions in AWID’s Sample WITM Global Survey

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Identify your survey population

This is an important step – the clearer you are about which populations you want to survey, the more refined your questions will be. 

Depending on your research goals, you may want to create separate surveys for women’s rights organizations, women’s funds and donors. Or you may want to focus your survey on women’s groups and collect interviews for women’s funds and donors, as a survey for each population can be resource-intensive.

The questions you ask women’s groups may be different than ones you would ask women’s funds. If you plan on surveying more than one population, we encourage you to tailor your data collection to each population.

At the same time, some key questions for each population can and should overlap in order to draw comparative analysis from the answers.

Online survey

If you can reach your survey population online, it is useful and efficient to create an online survey.

We recommend two online tools, both which offer free versions:

• Survey Monkey
• Survey Gizmo

Survey Gizmo allows you to convert your data for SPSS, a statistical software useful for advanced data analysis

Your data analyst person(s) will be the best person(s) to determine which tool is best for your survey based on staff capacity and analysis plans.

For accessibility, consider making a PDF form version of your survey that you can attach via email. This ensures organizations that have sporadic internet connections or those that pay for it by the minute can download the survey and complete it without requiring a constant online connection.

Paper survey

You may decide that an online approach is not sufficiently accessible or inclusive enough for your popuation.

In this case, you will need to create a paper survey and methods to reach offline populations (through popular events or through post, with pre-stamped envelopes for returning).

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Create your questions

Make it easy for participants to complete your survey.

1. Short and clear questions

If the questions are confusing or require complex answers, you risk having participants leave the survey unfinished or providing answers that are unusable for your analysis.

Ensure your questions only ask for one item of information at a time.

For example:

• What is your organization’s budget this year?
  Easy to answer: participant can easily locate this information for their organization, and it is only asking for one item of information.
• What percentage of your budget have you identified as likely sources for funding for your organization, but are still unconfirmed? 
  Confusing and difficult to answer: are you asking for a list of unconfirmed funding sources or percentage of funding that is likely but unconfirmed?
  This information is difficult to obtain: the respondent will have to calculate percentages, which they may not have on hand. This increases the risk that they will not complete the survey.

2. Simple and universal language

Many words and acronyms that are familiar to you may be unknown to survey participants, such as “resource mobilization”, “WHRD”, and “M&E”, so be sure to choose more universal language to express your questions.

If you must use industry lingo – phrases and words common to your colleagues but not widely known – then providing a definition will make your survey questions easier to understand.

Be sure to spell out any acronyms you use. For example, if you use WHRD, spell it out as “Women’s Human Rights Defenders".

3. "Closed” and "Open" questions

Closed questions:

Only one response is possible (such as “yes,” “no” or a number). Survey participants cannot answer in their own words and they typically have to choose from predetermined categories that you created or enter in a specific number. Responses to closed questions are easier to measure collectively and are often quantitative.

Example of a closed question: What is your organization’s budget?

Open-ended questions:

These are qualitative questions that are often descriptive. Respondents answer these questions entirely in their own words. These are more suitable for interviews than surveys.

They are harder to analyze at a collective level as compared to closed-end questions, especially if your survey sample is large. However, by making open-ended questions very specific, you will make it easier to analyze the responses.

Whenever possible, design your survey questions so that participants must select from a list of options instead of offering open-ended questions. This will save a lot of data cleaning and analysis time.

Example of open-ended question: What specific challenges did you face in fundraising this year?

Familiarize yourself with different types of questions

There are several ways to ask closed-ended questions. Here are some examples you can review and determine what fits best for the type of data you want to collect:

• Multiple choice questions: the participant can select one or several options you pre-entered
• Rating scales: the participant gives a note on a scale you pre-determine.
  For this type of questions, make sure to clearly state what the bottom and the top of your scale mean
• Ranking: the participant will choose and organize a certain number of answers you pre-determine.

View more question types

4. Logical organization

If you plan to conduct this research at regular intervals (such as every two years), we recommend developing a baseline survey that you can repeat in order to track trends over time.

Set 1: Screening questions

Screening questions will determine the participant’s eligibility for the survey.

The online survey options we provided allow you to end the survey if respondents do not meet your eligibility criteria. Instead of completing the survey, they will be directed to a page that thanks them for their interest but explains that this survey is intended for a different type of respondent.

For example, you only want women’s rights groups in a given location to take this survey. The screening questions can determine the location of the participant and prevent respondents from other locations from continuing the survey.

Set 2: Standardized, basic demographic questions

These questions would collect data specific to the respondent, such as name and location of organization. These may overlap with your screening questions.

If resources permit, you can store these answers on a database and only ask these questions the first year an organization participates in your survey.

This way when the survey is repeated in future years, it is faster for organizations to complete the entire survey, increasing chances of completion.

Set 3: Standardized and mandatory funding questions

These questions will allow you to track income and funding sustainability. Conducted every year or every other year, this allows you to capture trends across time.

Set 4: Special issues questions

These questions account for current context. They can refer to a changing political or economic climate. They can be non-mandatory funding questions, such as attitudes towards fundraising.

For example, AWID’s 2011 WITM Global Survey asked questions on the new “women & girls” investment trend from the private sector.

5. Less than 20 mins

The shorter, the better: your survey shouldn’t exceed 20 minutes to ensure completion and respect respondents’ time.

It is natural to get excited and carried away by all the types of questions that could be asked and all the information that could be obtained. However, long surveys will lead to fatigue and abandonment from participants or loss of connection between participants and your organization.

Every additional question in your survey will add to your analytical burden once the survey is complete.

6. Simple and exciting

• Let participants know the estimated time to complete the survey before they begin
• Specify what information they will need to complete it so they have it on hand (for example, if you are asking for financial data, say it at the outset so they can prepare)
• Request information that organizations can easily access and provide – for example, requesting financial information from 20 years ago may be difficult (or impossible) for organizations to provide.
• Create an incentive to convince your survey population to complete the survey, such as a prize raffle. For example, AWID held a raffle draw for a round-trip flight to the AWID Forum as a prize for completing our 2011 WITM Global Survey.

General tips

• Ask for exact budgets instead of offering a range (in our experience, specific amounts are more useful in analysis).
• Specify currency! If necessary, ask everyone to convert their answers to the same currency or ask survey takers to clearly state the currency they are using in their financial answers.
• Ensure you collect enough demographic information on each organization to contextualize results and draw out nuanced trends.
  For example, if you are analyzing WITM for a particular country, it will be useful to know what region each organization is from or at what level (rural, urban, national, local) they work in order to capture important trends such as the availability of greater funding for urban groups or specific issues.

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Test and translate

1. Your advisors

Involving your partners from the start will allow you to build deeper relationships and ensure more inclusive, higher quality research.

They will provide feedback on your draft survey, pilot test the survey, and review your draft research analysis drawn from your survey results and other data collection.

These advisors will also publicize the survey to their audiences once it is ready for release. If you plan on having the survey in multiple languages, ensure you have partners who use those languages.

If you decide to do both survey and interviews for your data collection, your advisor-partners on your survey design can also double as interviewees for your interview data collection process.

2. Draft and test

After your survey draft is complete, test it with your partners before opening it up to your respondents. This will allow you to catch and adjust any technical glitches or confusing questions in the survey.

It will also give you a realistic idea of the time it takes to take the survey.

3. Translation

Once the survey is finalized and tested in your native language, it can be translated.

Be sure to test the translated versions of your survey as well. At least some of your pilot testers should be native speakers of the translated languages to ensure clarity.

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Target the right population

1. Sample size

Your survey sample size is the number of participants that complete your survey.

Your survey sample should reflect the qualities of the larger population you intend to analyze.

For example: you would like to analyze the millions of women’s rights groups in Valyria but you lack the time and resources to survey every single one.
Instead, you can survey only 500 of the Valyrian women’s rights groups – a sample size - to represent the qualities of all the women’s groups in the region.

Recommended sample size

• 100 survey participants or less tend to be unreliable
• 250 to 400 will yield results of reasonable accuracy
• over 400 are fully adequate and will also allow accurate analysis of subgroups (for example, age groups).

Although it is not necessary to determine your exact sample size before you launch your survey, having a size in mind will allow you to determine when you have reached enough participants or whether you should extend the dates that the survey is available, in case you feel that you have not reached enough people.

2. Degree of participation

Even more important than size of a sample is the degree to which all members of the target population are able to participate in a survey.

If large or important segments of the population are systematically excluded (whether due to language, accessibility, timing, database problems, internet access or another factor) it becomes impossible to accurately assess the statistical reliability of the survey data.

In our example: you need to ensure all women’s groups in Valyria had the opportunity to participate in the survey.

If a segment of women’s groups in Valyria do not use internet, and you only pull participants for your sample through online methods, then you are missing an important segment when you have your final sample, thus it is not representative of all women’s groups in Valyria.

You cannot accurately draw conclusions on your data if segments of the population are missing in your sample size; and ensuring a representative sample allows you to avoid this mistake.

3. Database and contact list

To gain an idea of what the makeup of women’s groups for your area of research (region, population, issue, etc) looks like, it may be useful to look at databases.

• Some countries may have databases of all registered nonprofits, which will allow you to know your full population.
• If databases are not available or useful, you can generate your own list of groups in your area of research. Start with networks and coalitions, ask them to refer you to additional groups not in the membership lists.

By understanding the overall makeup of women’s groups that you plan to target, you can have an idea of what you want your sample to look like - it should be like a mini-version of the larger population.

After participants have taken your survey, you can then gauge if the resulting population you reached (your sample size) matches the makeup of the larger population. If it doesn’t match, you may then decide to do outreach to segments you believe are missing or extend the window period that your survey is open.

Do not be paralyzed if you are unsure of how representative your sample size is – do your best to spread your survey as far and wide as possible.

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Où est l’argent ? Un plaidoyer documenté pour soutenir les organisations féministe

Ce rapport révèle la réalité du financement des organisations féministes et de défense des droits des femmes dans un contexte de bouleversements politiques et financiers. S’appuyant sur plus de dix ans d’analyse depuis la dernière étude Où est l’argent ? de l’AWID (Arroser les feuilles, affamer les racines), il dresse un bilan des progrès réalisés, des lacunes persistantes et des menaces croissantes dans le domaine du financement féministe.

Le rapport salue le pouvoir des initiatives menées par les mouvements pour façonner le financement selon leurs propres conditions, tout en alertant sur les coupes massives dans l’aide au développement, le recul de la philanthropie et l’escalade des offensives anti-droits. 

Il appelle les bailleurs de fonds à investir massivement dans l’organisation féministe, infrastructure essentielle pour la justice et la libération, et invite les mouvements à réimaginer des modèles de financement audacieux et autodéterminés, fondés sur le soin, la solidarité et le pouvoir collectif.

Le rapport sera bientôt disponible

Context

The current global economic crisis provides stark evidence that the economic policies of the last 3 decades have not been working.

The devastation that the crisis has wrought on the most vulnerable households in the Global North and Global South is a reminder that the formulation of economic policy and the realization of human rights (economic, social, political, civil and cultural) have for too long been divorced from one another. Economic policy and human rights do not have to be opposing forces, but can exist symbiotically.

Macroeconomic policies affect the operation of the economy as a whole, shaping the availability and distribution of resources. Within this context, fiscal and monetary policies are key.

Definition

• Fiscal policy refers to both public revenue and public expenditure, and the relationships between them as expressed in the government budget.
• Monetary policy includes policies on interest and exchange rates and the money supply, as well as the regulation of the financial sector.
• Macroeconomic policies are implemented using instruments such as taxation, government spending, and control over the supply of money and credit.

These policies affect key prices such as interest and exchange rates that directly influence, among other things, the level of employment, access to affordable credit, and the housing market.

Applying a human rights framework to macroeconomic policy allows States to better comply with their obligation to respect, protect, and fulfill economic and social rights. Human rights are internationally agreed-upon universal standards. These legal norms are articulated in United Nations treaties including, the Universal Declaration of Human Rights (UDHR), the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights (ICCPR), and the International Covenant on Economic, Social and Cultural Rights (ICESCR).

Article 1 of the UDHR states that, “All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights.”

Although the UDHR was written about six decades ago its relevance is enduring. Many of the ideas address concerns and critical issues that people continue to face globally. Issues regarding inhuman punishment (Art. 5), discrimination (Art. 7), property ownership (Art. 17), equal pay for equal work (Art. 23/2), and access to education (Art. 26/1) are pertinent matters in countries South and North of the equator.

More specifically, States have an obligation under international law to respect, protect and fulfill human rights, including the economic and social rights of people within their jurisdiction. This is particularly relevant now given the financial crisis. In the U.S., regulation is skewed in favor of certain interests. The failure to extend government’s supervisory role in the context of social and economic change is a failure with regard to the obligation to protect human rights.

Feminist perspective

States should abide by key human rights principles to achieve economic and social rights. Some of the principles have potentially important implications for governance of financial institutions and markets, yet these possibilities have been underexplored.

Economic and social rights have a concrete institutional and legal grounding. Global declarations, international treaties, covenants, and, in a number of cases, national constitutions have incorporated aspects of the economic and social rights framework—providing an institutional infrastructure in national and international law.

Some have suggested that a consideration of global justice may not be a useful pursuit because of the institutional complexities involved. However, this does not get around that fact that global institutions already have an impact on social justice, both positive and negative.

It is useful to tease out the implications that elements of alternative frameworks have for economic governance, specifically those supported by existing institutions. Economic and social rights represent one such concrete framework. The framework is an evolving one, and ongoing discussion and deliberation is necessary to address underdeveloped areas and potential deficiencies.

Learn more about this proposition

• How to Apply a Human Rights Framework to Macroeconomic Strategies by Center for Women’s Global Leadership (CWGL)

This section is based on CWGL’s blog “Applying a Human Rights Framework to Macroeconomic Policies” (2012).

These industries 'extract' raw materials from the Earth: mining, timber, gas, oil are some examples

This economical model exploits nature and as it intensifies, so does the inequality between global North with their large corporations, and the global South, where resources are extracted.

Land contamination, water pollution, environmental damage, communities displaced are only some of the consequences.

Find more on our report on EXTRACTIVE INDUSTRIES

There are sustainable alternatives for the environment and women's rights.

"A Feminist Approach to Understanding Illicit Financial Flows and Redirecting Global Wealth"

Download your facilitation guide in English

This Guide is also available in Spanish and Russian

Thanks to the co-creators of this facilitation guide:

• Daniela Fonkatz and Ana Ines Abelenda (AWID)
• Zenaida Joachim (Mesoamericanas en Resistencia - El Salvador)
• Olga Shnyrova (Ivanovo Center for Gender Studies - Russia)
• Leah Eryenyu (Akina Mama Wa Afrika - Uganda)
• Daryl Leyesa (Oriang and PKKK/National Rural Women Congress - the Philippines)

Download the Participation Guide

Chapter 4

A complex and evolving network of anti-rights actors is exerting increasing influence in international spaces as well as domestic politics. Often backed by obscure funding, these actors build tactic alliances across issues, regions, and faiths to increase their impact.  

We are witnessing fascist and fundamentalist actors that, while nationalist in their discourse, are completely transnational in their ideological underpinnings, political alliances, and networks of financing. In some cases these groups are backed by obscure funding flows, linked with big business, or far-right political parties. However, they also create strategic alliances, including, in some cases, with segments of the feminist and women’s rights movements, and distance themselves from more outwardly extreme elements to appear more legitimate. Anti-rights actors are also spreading and replicating their brand of anti-rights organizing -  be that campaigning and lobbying or strategic litigation - across the globe. 

Table of Contents

• CitizenGo
• Alliance Defending Freedom (ADF)
• Funding of Anti-rights Actors 
• The Links Between Anti-trans Feminists and Christian Fundamentalists
• Exercise: Let’s Map the Landscape
• Movement Resistance Story: Catolicadas, a Powerful Communication Tool to Promote Gender Equality and Sexual and Reproductive Rights
   

Read Full Chapter >

Thank you, Ángela and Pilar.
 

Yannia Sofía Garzón Valencia I am a Black woman and a community weaver. I live in Santander de Quilichao in Cauca, Colombia. I am interested in the creative processes that organize sustainable collective life. I like exchanging thoughts and cooking, investigating and analyzing, planting seeds and learning from plants, reading and playing. I am currently coordinating the observatory of gender-based violence against afro-descendant communities in Colombia (@VigiaAfro).

The three of us were “sharing” the afternoon in a neighborhood south of Bogota. 

 There was an unusually large green playing area and we sat on little wooden stools under an elderberry tree. We were finally experiencing that other form of love – that pleasure of being together and listening to each other. For me, these kinds of chats are among the expressions of love that life had only recently allowed me to enjoy. I had not known this other form of love – the kinds found outside workshops, activist spaces, classrooms, or workplaces – to be possible. Yet we three friends spent the afternoon amongst ourselves and we did not pretend to be blind to the color of our respective skins. Rather, it was a lived factor that allowed us to intimately discuss the similarities and differences in our childhood and youthful experiences.
 
Those chats were unrelated to any upcoming activities of the Black movement in Colombia, but they still nourish me and acquire new meanings. Our closeness was woven through coming together, recognizing each other, and identifying the uniqueness of our liberations. And by realizing there is not just one but many paths to liberation – those paths we inhabited every time we said “no” and rebelled. Far from feeling discomfort, we met in an authenticity made of weakness and strength, one which brought us closer instead of separating us.
 
Our purpose on that beautiful afternoon was to just be – to have an awareness of simply being amongst ourselves. We walked through our pasts so that the memories that stayed with us were those we decided to keep as ours, and not those that fear let through and found a place for. We remembered exact fragments of TV shows, and sang songs written by artists who had taught us about loving well, hating well, cursing like the worst villain, and suffering like the best leading lady. 
 
We told each other about our school pranks, and what remained in our subconscious after being exposed to the many ways the media repeats the same thing – after the teachers and nuns at school overexposed us to stories so that we would identify with and appropriate Cinderella’s aspirations for our own lives. This would set the tone for the rest of our story: the drama of the impoverished and diminished girl who is yet to achieve her full value through an act that redeems her condition. And that act can only be brought about by the gaze of a male who, at the very least, is white, hence deserving of what is between our thighs – his “main aspiration” – and the “perfect realization of our dreams,” which we are told should then be our main aspiration.
 
There were three of us there that afternoon. Each had been brought up in a different part of the country, but it was fascinating that we could all still quote fragments and situations from songs and soap operas that often – as we realized by getting to know each other – shared codes or symbols that were replicated, with a few variations, in our homes, in our first relationships, and in our neighborhoods and schools. Brought up by “dramas” (is that what that very successful genre is called?) where the more you suffer, the more you deserve, the issue of “how and in which situations it is acceptable and legitimate to suffer” becomes an important mandate on how the person who suffers should be seen, what they should do, and whom they should be. Some of us managed to liberate ourselves and “learn” a definition of love that could only be learnt in adulthood, shattering illusions, and accepting natural sin. And becoming aware of the industrial production of a virgin, which we may refuse to look like as she has no place in our understanding, and the disappointment this alienation brings.
 

After singing, we reviewed our early sexual explorations. I never thought that most people experienced them before the age of nine and that even in adulthood, those experiences, those memories, remain a heavy burden. Even today, in thousands of places, millions of girls and boys see their innocence curtailed by lack of trust and the ignorance we present them with when they try to explore their bodies. Blaming curiosity is a most efficient control mechanism. We went back to the brief conversations we had when we changed the history of our lives from cursed Black beings to a perspective that rebirthed us. We remembered how many of our aunts and female cousins left their homes, their core, their roots, to seek a future outside, elsewhere.
 

The future comes with a price: it demands that those relationships that marked our childhood are reshaped and confined to oblivion. They are our foundations, but they are not relevant if we want to move ahead. For us, advancing was to learn by heart what we do to ourselves with the opportunities we find elsewhere. That it is elsewhere, and not within us, that opportunities lie, that we are available, that we need to be outside. However, for many of our aunts and female cousins, the few opportunities to enroll and stay in an evening class or take a sabbatical from domestic work were paid for by becoming the first sexual experience of relatives living in the future. A future for which others before them had also paid for, and whose price they had already forgotten. The demand for this payment arrived with the same inevitability as a public utility service bill. We will not take up that legacy.
 
In Colombia and Latin America, there was an etiquette manual called La urbanidad de Carreño (Carreño’s Etiquette Manual). It was mandatory reading until the 90s in both public and private schools. The manual conditioned how bodies were perceived and my mother, taken in and brought up by Carmelite nuns, knew it by heart. The first time I read it I had to stop more than once to rub my stomach, which hurt from laughing so much. It has ridiculous instructions such as: take a shower with your eyes closed and turn off the lights to wear your nightclothes. Different chapters address how one is to behave at home, in the street, and during a dinner or lunch party – in short, the norms of good taste and etiquette. The ethical core of good citizens was the urbanity that allowed one to distance oneself from rural life. The same manual indicated that shouting a greeting to an acquaintance on the other side of the street was indecorous; good manners dictate that you must cross the street. By the same token, men must remove their coats and place them over puddles of water if accompanying a woman whose shoes should not get wet. I thought about greeting someone across a river, and how it is so hot where we live that we don’t require coats. 
 

"She learned that to care for her belly, she needed to keep her tissues warm, to avoid the cold that comes through the soft spot on the top of the head, through the feet, the ears, so it would not hurt particularly at moontime. For that, you need to be careful about what you eat and what you don’t eat, how you dress and how you walk, as all that has to do with girls’ health. The woman elder says that, from her devoted grandfather, she learnt that cramps became more common when houses no longer had floors made of mud and/or wood. When concrete and tiles came, when the material making up the house allowed the cold to come in through the feet, tension also grew in the belly tissue."

The manual’s author, Mr. Carreño is the opposite of the grandfather of a woman elder born in Turbo. She told me once that her grandfather was a wise man, that he told her about birthing and how to take care of her body. She learned that to care for her belly, she needed to keep her tissues warm, to avoid the cold that comes through the soft spot on the top of the head, through the feet, the ears, so it would not hurt, particularly at moontime. For that, you need to be careful about what you eat, how you dress, and how you walk, as all that has to do with a girl’s health. The woman elder said that, from her devoted grandfather, she learnt that cramps became more common when houses no longer had floors made of mud and/or wood. When concrete and tiles came, when the material making up the house allowed the cold to come in through the feet, tensions in the belly tissue also grew.
 
Surprised again. Such a distance between Don Carreño and the wise grandfather in terms of being aware of life – as distant as the mandates of proper behavior that stifle your impulses and senses, even the most common sense that values health. At that moment, I was able to understand one of the many ways that concrete obstructs the earth’s breathing, and our own as part of her. I had not realized there was, and still is, the architecture and materials for taking care of our bodies. In Colombia, as well as in other countries, the materials used to make houses are taken as indicators of multidimensional poverty. A house built with concrete moves the home away from being considered poor. This is just one disappointing example of how progress pushes us to abandon the relationship between our environment and our body. Good taste and urbanity pushes us outside: to move forward, they lie, you have to go out there.
 
It bothered us to realize that neither our mothers nor fathers had spoken to us about menstruation, except when the brown stain had already smeared our knickers. They failed to preserve us from the shame that was supposed to be a natural feeling once menstruation had come. Along with menstruation came the belly cramps often endured in silence, because there was work to be done; some cramps were due to cysts, hematomas, or fibroids that killed the grandmothers who had discovered and forgotten the healing treatments, and then were forgotten themselves. That our mothers and fathers’ breaths turned colder and colder, but the Outside froze familiarity and, instead of warming our bellies, passed judgment with advice similar to warnings of the only thing men care about. This was applied to all men – legitimizing the plundering role of the phallus, as if its only option was to take what we have between our legs. The multiple versions of that truth were replaced by an unmovable and deeply-set naturalization: telling all women that we must preserve ourselves for one of them, for the one that will first introduce his penis inside us, for the one that will give us something in exchange, and that we are women only because we aspire to and let him put it inside us. As a girl I explored little penises and clitorises and, in between games among girls, the question was whispered: whose turn is it to play man and whose turn is it to play woman? And the answer: the beginnings of little orgasms, regardless of with whom. I guess the same must happen among male bodies.
 
The experiences and explorations of our aunts, female cousins, and acquaintances focused on the body and its nudity as taboo. They avoided expressing and naming it, to the point of covering it up, assigning new names to its excreting, expelling, procreating, and, just for us women, its receiving functions. Once I heard a woman elder in a workshop say that when she was living with her grandmother, her memory was of this old woman sleeping with one eye open, the other closed, and a rifle by the mattress. The softest night sound was enough for her to grab the rifle and aim. This is a common situation in the Colombian Pacific, where some harmful behaviors are normalized. Married and single men who like a young woman would enter her room at night – we call it gateada. It was a risk: if those with authority in the home realized what was happening, abuse or not, the man could be hurt or even killed.
 
This practice of taking the law into one’s own hands has failed to put an end to gateadas, even today. In that same workshop – as I kept telling my sisters – other participants said that neither they nor their mothers would leave their daughters alone with their fathers at bath time, unless the girls were wearing underwear. I remembered then my father’s voice saying, when I was seven, your mother never let me bathe you. After sharing this, another woman responded that, in contrast, her father would give her a bath naked in the courtyard of her childhood home until she turned seven, and then her eldest brother did it until she turned nine. She never felt anything strange in the way they looked at her; for them, it was just another task in caring for the most spoiled child in the home. She remembered being seen for what she was: a daughter child, a sister child, who did not like the water.
 
Once again childhoods, yesterday and today. We were surprised by that story, and it comforted us. Even I had seen things being different elsewhere; my daughter’s father bathed her in the tub until she was almost two. Even before turning two, he would give her a few soft slaps upwards on her bum, to make it bigger, as he said. Here, we could also speak of other dimensions of how we construct our bodies, but that is a different story. For me, it was one care task, among many, that we agreed to divide between ourselves before the baby was born. And the decision to not see every man as a lurking rapist does not mean they are not rapists, but instead that they can stop being so. There are also men and male bodies that have been brought up to never be rapists.
 
This is still happening. It happened to a friend of ours and to my own daughter. I thought: how can it be that some women are coupled with men they cannot trust to care for their daughters? I am sure that my mum loved my dad. And even though we seldom speak about the woman she was before becoming my mum, I know her experiences of abuse cannot be compared to the brutality and over-tolerance of those of today. But that is still a decision many women in many places make, and that leads to other questions. How often, how repeated were cases of abuse in our extended families to make women openly, or in indiscernible ways, forbid their partners from bathing their daughters? Is it related to the media overexposure we are subject to almost from birth? What makes family ties blur and turn into just bodily-satisfaction exchanges? Is it the proximity to urban values that cares so much about the right shapes of female bodies as objects of desire, and pushes male bodies to behave like owners and conquerors, fulfilling the mandate to mimic media representations so they feel safe in their identity? Is it concrete and other codes, like the Carreño etiquette, that sustain it? Is it encouraged by the need to forget certain relationships as the price of progress, that insistence on “doing for the outside?” What happens to what we learned in our times, those of us who, in secret or not, undertook sexual explorations as children? Were they erased by guilt? Were they the seeds of mistrust and shame in nudity? Were they the seeds of mistrust and shame of being inside oneself? Indeed, aren’t these learnings possibilities to trust in, understand the nudity of bodies as part of respecting oneself and others? These questions emerge in trusted spaces, where the fear to say what one thinks and feels is driven away by the intention of accompaniment. I imagine how many of us there are in all corners of this planet and I am certain these are not new questions, that messages in them are repeated, and that we find ourselves living the answers.

Dear gorgeous beings,

I know you are so close. You can feel it can't you? How things need to shift and you need to centre yourself. 

This is a letter to tell you to do it. Choose your healing. Choose to be OK. Better than OK. Choose to be whole, to be happy. To cry tears for yourself and no one else. Choose to shut out the world and tell them that 'you will be back in 5 mins'. Or five days. Or five years. 

Or never.

Choose to not take it all on. Choose to take none of it on. Because none of it is yours. It was never yours. They told you since you were born that it was yours. Your family's problems. Your lovers' problems. Your neighbours' problems. The globe's problems. The constant whisper that these problems belong to you. They are yours. Yours to hold, yours to shoulder. Yours to fix. 

That was a lie.
A bamboozle 
            A long con.
                          A scam.

The problems of the universe are not yours.

The only problems that are yours are your own. Everyone else can take a hike. 

Allow yourself to drop everything and sprint off into the jungle. Befriend a daisy clad nymph, start a small library in the roots of a tree. Dance naked and howl at the moonlight. Converse with Oshun at the river bed. 

                          Or simply drink a cup of tea when you need to take a moment to breathe.

Give yourself permission to disappear into the mist and reappear three countries over as a mysterious chocolatier with a sketchy past and penchant for dramatic cloaks and cigars. 

                          Or stop answering work calls on weekends.

Let yourself swim to deserted island with a lover and dress only in the coconut shells from coconut rum that you make and sip at sunset. 

Or say no when you don't have the capacity to create space for someone.

The options for holding yourself are endless. 

Whatever you do, know the world will always keep spinning. That's the beauty and the pain of it. No matter who or what you choose over yourself and your soul the world will always keep spinning. 

Therefore, choose you. 

In the morning when that first light hits, choose you. When it’s lunchtime and it’s time to cry on company time, choose you.  In the evening, when you are warming up leftovers because you didn’t have time to cook again, choose you. When anxiety wakes you up and existence is silent at 3:45 am. 

Choose you.

Love,
Your dramatically cloaked jungle nymph.