Sexting Like a Feminist: Humor in the Digital Feminist Revolution

On September 2nd, 2021, the amazing feminist and social justice activists of AWID’s Crear | Résister | Transform festival came together not only to share resistance strategies, co-create, and transform the world, but also to talk dirty on Twitter.

The exercise was led by Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah, co-founder of the blog Adventures From The Bedrooms of African Women and author of The Sex Lives of African Women, who paired up with the Pan-Africanist digital queer womanist platform AfroFemHub, to ask the question: How can we safely and consensually explore our pleasure, desires, and fantasies via text?

Basically: How would a feminist sext?

I believe this is a critically important question because it looks at the larger issue of how one navigates the online world with a feminist understanding. Under capitalism, discourse around bodies and sex can be dehumanizing and distorting, and navigating sexual pleasure in virtual spaces can feel performative. So seeking out avenues where we can explore how we share our desire in ways that are affirming and enthusiastic can push back against dominant models of presentation and consumption to reclaim these spaces as sites for authentic engagement, proving that all sexting should be just that: feminist.

Plus, allowing feminist discourse to embody its playful side in online discourse helps reframe a popular narrative that feminist engagement is joyless and dour. But as we know, having fun is part of our politics, and an inherent part of what it means to be feminist.

Using the hashtag #SextLikeAFeminist, scholars and activists from all over the world chimed in with their thirstiest feminist tweets, and here are my top ten.

As these tweets show, it turns out that sexting like a feminist is sexy, funny – and horny. Yet, it never loses sight of its commitment to equity and justice.

Cuando recién conociste a alguien y necesitas decirle algo bueno

Vamos despacio y con amabilidad. Los orgasmos, como la construcción de los movimientos feministas, llevan tiempo, energía y un poquito de creatividad.

Les vrai·e·s féministes n’humilient pas les désirs des autres.

La révolution dans ton froc ne passera pas à la télé… sauf si ce genre de truc t’excite, ce dont on peut parler… en personne [emoji visage avec des larmes de joie].

This report looks back and celebrates the first year of AWID’s new strategic plan as we took our first steps towards our desired outcomes of supporting feminist movements to thrive, challenging anti-rights agendas and co-creating feminist realities.

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We worked with feminists to disrupt anti-rights agendas, achieving important victories fought and won within the United Nations system when ground-breaking language on structural discrimination, sexual rights, and states’ obligations were included in a number of resolutions. Yes, the multilateral system is in crisis and in need of serious strengthening but these victories are important as they contribute to the legitimacy of feminist demands, providing feminist movements with more pressure points and momentum to advance our agendas.

We tried and tested different ways to build knowledge with feminist movements through webinars, podcasts and ‘live’ conversations. We developed facilitation guides with popular educators to reclaim knowledge in the interest of social and gender justice, even about a topic as seemingly opaque as illicit funding flows. We commissioned blogs and opinions about how feminist groups fund and resource themselves and threw light on the threats facing our human rights systems.

Within AWID, we practiced and learned from our shared leadership approach, and told the story of the trials and tribulations of co-leading a global, virtual organization. We don’t have a definitive answer to what feminist leadership looks like, but we know, a year on, that a continued commitment to collective experimentation and learning has enabled us to keep building an organization that we are all excited to contribute to.

As we look back on this year, we want to thank all our friends and supporters, colleagues and companions, who have given their time and shared their wealth of knowledge and wisdom with us. We want to thank our members who helped frame our strategic plan and joined us to make feminist demands. We could not do this work without you.

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Lindiwe Rasekoala is a life coach who specializes in intimacy and relationship wellness coaching. She is a sexual health enthusiast and online contributor. Through her own experiences and unconventional methods of research, she believes she can bridge the education gap and lack of access to information around sexual wellness. She is a contributor on various radio and television shows, and has completed her coach training with the Certified Coaches Alliance. Lindiwe’s mission is to break down the barriers to conversations around sexual wellness and to empower her clients to achieve greater understanding of themselves so that they can experience a more healthy and holistic lifestyle and relationships.